Avocado hand—the colloquial name for a condition arising from improper avocado cutting technique—sounds like it might be grotesque in a sort of Cronenbergian way, but is actually grotesque in more of a Wes Craven-esque sort of way. Seriously, don’t image search it. The prevalence of this self inflicted wound is, in my opinion, due in part to the fact that nobody on the internet seems to get the technique for breaking down an avocado right. Even cooking websites that I love, staffed with people whose opinions I trust implicitly seem to always get at least a couple things wrong. Thus I felt compelled to offer what I can in the fight against completely-avoidable-and-slightly-embarrassing-injuries.
The main thing that contributes to people cutting their hands open trying to get inside an avocado is this romantic idea that all avocado processing steps can, nay should be done while holding the fruit (technically a berry) in your hand. This is a pernicious lie. Free your minds, people. The best way to quickly and easily access the fatty flesh of the avocado is by keeping it on your dang cutting board away from the fatty flesh on the palms of your hands. Not only that, but using your cutting board actually makes cutting the avocado easier, and you’ll get better, more regular cuts. Ready? Here we go…
I am not a huge avocado fan, or I would probably have already added this to my list of self-inflicted knife wounds.
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